WHY DO WE NEED THERAPY?
Unfortunately, one of the common reactions to conflict developed management style is that we “must endure”, which in reality only shows so called learned helplessness of coping with stress – conflict successfully. A result of being patient lies in the fact that unresolved conflict/stress remains in human and is most often seen in dysfunctional/subordinate behavior, keeping unsaid in yourself, psychosomatic disorder – which are the warnings that something is not right, various forms of addictions, blunted integrity of human being, relationships, health. Long-term presence of stress inhibits the immune system because of increased hormone cortisol. With not resolving conflict/stress and trying to “endure” we set an example to descendants – and “things just go on”. Conflict caused by various factors and driven by the desire to control, expressing power over someone, is stress for an individual, especially the one in subordinate position. It is good for a person that conflict is solved immediately. The tolerance for conflict – unsolved situation is created if this does not happen due to various reasons, later, as in case of addiction, by extending the time when problem is not solved only adds to it and strengthens it. This forms an individual’s inner model of solving the conflict, coping with stress. The presence of long-term stress is fatal to humans because it negatively affects the immune system and health. Individual reactions to conflict – stress stem from early childhood and later trauma or even abuse. All this is reflected through the attachment style that an individual establishes with others and how he “takes care of himself”.
2. The treatment begins when we coordinate left and right brain hemisphere
Treatment of various difficult experiences occurs when left brain hemisphere cooperates with right for example, when we confess our life story. Telling our life stories helps us to understand ourselves and our world with including left and right hemisphere together. Storytelling creates meaning, where left hemisphere puts things in order with words and logic. Right hemisphere contributes physical feelings, vivid emotions and personal memories so we can see the whole picture and the message of our experience. Denial of our own emotions, feelings is not the only danger we are facing when facing the obstacle of too cumbersome left hemisphere. We can become too literal, with no sense of perspective, aspect, where we miss the purpose resulting from putting things in context – mental association – this is specialty of right part of brains. Implicit memory includes our perceptions, our emotions, physical sensations, implicit knowledge (cycling, swimming…). The problem with implicit memory is that if there were painful and negative experiences in the past and if we are not aware of them, they can become burning earth full of mines which can prevent and restrict us in different ways in the present life. With illuminating and awareness of implicit memories we can make them explicit and so they become memories we are aware of and an individual can face them wisely.